We often wish that we could go back and change the past to correct our present. Yet we never acknowledge the fact that we can change the present which will likewise change the future. I tried reliving the past to change the present and future in 10th grade. I realized that the only way anyone can change the future and the present is by doing it themselves and taking action.
In my freshman year, I was on track to a perfect honor roll year. In middle school this had always been the case so I saw no reason to worry too much about my grades. However, the pressures of high school had caught up to me, and for the first time, one of my quarter grades ended up below 90 percent. I went numb after discovering that I had failed at achieving the one thing I had accomplished all throughout middle school. I managed to pull myself together and finished the year with good grades but that feeling of failure stayed with me that year.
I thought I had hurt my chances at college because of one quarter and I needed to do something that would ensure that I get all 90s for 10th grade. I thought back to 8th grade where I had good grades and thought that if I could simply relive the past, I would magically get the grades I had in middle school. I went as far as copying my routine and listening to the same music to try and trick my mind that I was back in middle school. My brain knew this was not true though, and all through 10th grade I had quarter grades below 90. I felt as if I had lost my sense of direction.
In the summer of 2018 something different happened. School was coming up and I was doing absolutely nothing to prepare myself for junior year which was supposedly the most important year for colleges. I was following my summer routine of binging Youtube videos when I stumbled across a video on the benefits of cold showers. I had never taken a cold shower before, and when I came out, I felt like a completely new person. I felt a sense of motivation I never had before and saw that I needed to clean out my room which had not been cleaned in years. Seeing my room cleaned gave me a sense of accomplishment which is referred to as an Internal Locus of control. Taking the initiative to correct something (or in this case cleaning your room) causes the feeling that you are in control of your own destiny.
If I followed this approach, I knew I could turn my life in high school around. After the summer, I had a huge boost in confidence in my ability to influence my outcomes. I took every class one assignment at a time, only submitting my best work and getting help from teachers and peers when I needed. From this newfound confidence, I applied for a part-time job as waitstaff at a retirement community which further helped me in improving myself with new time management, task accomplishment, and communication skills. I can attribute my success back to the cold shower and cleaning my room, which motivated me to take control of my life and get the good grades I had sought after.
I now know that I am ready for college and am ready to put the lessons I learned during high school to good use. I am passionate about using these lessons to benefit a business and lead the way through example. College will be the next step in my life and I am excited to see where it takes me.
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